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Question: Are you still in Albuquerque?

Asked on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 03:05:37 PM
Reply: I'll let Rod respond to any questions that are asked about him.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
19th anniversary from "Rod" part 2 cont
Question: cont...

The newsprint got completely soaked and the rubbing looked horrible. You couldn’t make out what Lois wrote for her daughters grave. Once the sprinklers stopped, and my chuckles subsided, I got a few towels from my trunk and dried off her grave marker. I pulled another sheet of newsprint and got to work again. I was unable to determine what I was doing wrong, but what I thought would be a perfect duplicate of the sweet words on Kait’s marker was more of a smudged puzzle of marks vaguely resembling anything.

The sun was starting to set, so I put aside the newsprint and put a new white candle I had purchased onto Kait’s marker. Of course now the wind decided to whip up and keeping her candle lit became troublesome. Nature was intent on helping Kait make a wish this year, and far be it for me to deny her. After a few more moments of contemplation, I picked up her candle, the charcoal sticks, and the failed rubbing attempts, and went back to my car.

I blew a kiss in the direction of her grave and whispered, “Maybe this year, kiddo.”

Asked on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 01:32:02 AM
19th anniversary from \"Rod\" part 2
Question: 35 years old. I’d been 35 for three months when I headed for Sunset Memorial Park an hour before sunset. I had my laptop, a large binder full of newsprint, and some charcoal sticks. I had been planning to due a rubbing of her gravestone for years, but never felt up to the task. My 35th year had been life altering though, so I thought this would be the birthday I would finally get it done.
As usual, only a few cars were scattered throughout the grounds when I pulled up to the big tree that sits in line with Kait’s grave at the corner of Canna & Rose within the cemetery. The first duty of my ritual is to kiss the first two fingers of my right hand and gently tap the marker that denotes Kait lies sweetly within the ground. Then a “Hiya Kiddo”, though I don’t know why I use ‘kiddo’ as I was only 3 months older than her and never called her that when she was alive.
For the most part, the cemetery keeps Kait’s grave marker clear of overgrowth, but I pulled a few strands of grass away to keep the edge clean. I sat the pad down and began to rip one large page from the binder. It didn’t completely cover Kait’s grave marker. I opened the charcoal container, which contained 3 sticks. I took one out and started to brush the page on top of the gravestone with it. About half way into the rubbing, the sprinklers turned on and started blasting me from several directions with water.
I started laughing, as even 16 years later; some remnant of Kait must reside here as this feels like the kind of thing she would do to get me.

Asked on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 01:30:24 AM
Reply: Rod, this story is fascinating in light of a reading that psychic, Betty Muench, did in 1993. You had just revealed yourself to us, and we weren't sure if you truly WERE Kait's secret second boyfriend or what your relationship with her -- if it truly existed -- might have been. In other words, we were deciding whether or not to trust you.

So, without your knowing, I had Betty Muench do a reading on you. All of it was positive, but there was one particular thing she said that is reflected in your story of Kait's "getting you" and making you laugh when you were trying to do this rubbing in the cemetary:

Betty said: "There will be this sense of a special humor between Kait and Rod that formed a bond of affinity. There will be this which he will seem to miss very much, for now he knows he cannot laugh with her any longer .... To him this sense of the humor that existed between him and Kait seems diminished, but NOT TO HER!!!

Answered by: Kait's Mom
19th anniversary from "Rod" part 1
Question: I remember exactly where I was with vivid detail when I learned that Kait was dead. I somewhat remember our first kiss, vaguely remember when we met, but I remember that moment on the morning of July 18, 1989 like it was today.
I was at the Winchell’s donut shop on Wyoming, just south of Menual with my father when he set the paper down on the table after getting us some donuts. Though I love the smell of coffee and occasionally drink it, it runs right through me so I rarely get it, and this day was no exception. Apple fritter, that’s the donut I had.

“Honor Student Dies Following Car Shooting” the paper read. “Oh that’s sad,” I thought an instant before my world began to spin like a top thrown haphazardly by a toddler. “That looks like Kait!” I thought as I grabbed the paper. “Oh my god. This can’t be,” I continued to think as my heart seized. “We’re going to Cliff’s this weekend,” I kept repeating over and over again in my head.

I read the story, and reread the story, hungrily trying to find the page that said that the Journal apologized for getting the facts incorrect and that Kait was indeed fine and well at home. Then my thoughts turned dark. “Dung knows.” I thought to myself, “He killed Kait and now he’s going to kill me.”

I looked around the donut shop to see if any Vietnamese males were waiting in the wings to execute me too. There weren’t any. That was the exact moment when I ‘died.’ It wasn’t a literal death, but the person I was supposed to become would never see another day.

Asked on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 01:25:49 AM
19th anniversary from "Rod"
Question: On this 19th anniversary, I thought I would post some writings I’ve done over the years when I throw myself back into the emotional mire of my existence without Kait. I’m in no way the author Lois is, but I hope you all find this literary exchange an interesting glimpse into “Rod”...

Asked on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 01:23:54 AM
Kait Question
Question: Did you ever locate the "Rod" that was mentioned in your book?

Asked on Thursday, July 03, 2008 at 05:24:47 PM
Reply: I didn't locate Rod, ROD located ME. He contacted me after reading WHO KILLED MY DAUGHTER? He was, indeed, Kait's "secret boyfriend," but was not the person who took her to The Desert Castle.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Not a drive-by
Question: Judging by Kait's car alone, you can tell this was not a drive-by shooting. I don't know the speed limit of where this occured, but if someone drove by and just shot someone, the car's damage would be more severe than if someone was in the process of slowing down when being chased off the road. That's my observation. On my way home from Arizona, I drove through Albuquerque and thought about your family the rest of the trip.

Asked on Thursday, July 03, 2008 at 11:32:07 AM
Reply: Also, if Kait had been holding the steering wheel and driving when she was shot in the left side of the head, her grip on the wheel would have caused the car to veer right as she fell to the right.

The car would not have gone left.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Charles/Manny Aragon news article July 2, 2008

Asked on Thursday, July 03, 2008 at 07:31:18 AM
Reply: The person who posted this URL is alerting us to an article in the Albuquerque Journal. Chuck Aragon, (the brother of Manny Aragon, who was president pro tem of the New Mexico State Senate at the time of Kait's death) has been arrested at a Border Patrol check point and charged with possession with intent to distribute almost half a million dollars worth of marijuana. Chuck has two prior federal drug convictions, one of which was for being chief financier of a multi-state drug smuggling operation at the time of Kait's murder. I describe that operation on pg. 314 of the paperback edition of WHO KILLED MY DAUGHTER?, but don't identify Chuck by name, as my publisher was afraid of upsetting the senator by implicating his family in criminal activities.

However, now that Manny, himself, has been charged with fourteen counts of conspiracy, mail fraud and money laundering, I guess we no longer need to worry about smearing his family name.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Question: Almost 11 years ago, I was sitting in my first high school English class ever. My teacher was passionate about books, including yours. Not only did he praise your books, but he made us all aware of what had happened to Kait. We had lengthy discussions about the case all year long.

It sickens me to know that corruption to this extent really and truly exists, especially in a large city. I would assume there must be some important people involved for it to have gone this far.

I won't lie - I couldn't bring myself to read the book about Kait. It breaks my heart just to get online and read this website. But I still think of her. It seems silly, but she just seems like the kind of person I would have wanted to be friends with. So when I look up this site, I always hope that instead of the webpage asking "Who Killed Kait Arquette?" it will instead say "We Know Who Killed Kait Arquette."

It hasn't happened yet. But I look forward to the day that it does. Not just for her family and friends, but for Kait as well. I wholeheartedly believe she was trying to do what she thought was right. I also believe that there is someone out there who will do what's right, and will finally speak for Kait.

Asked on Wednesday, July 02, 2008 at 08:37:26 PM
Reply: Thank you for this kind message. We, too, believe she was trying to do what was right. She just didn't do it soon enough.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Bullets .22 caliber
Question: I think it is very possible that the bullet might shatter enough that you wouldn't be able to find pieces large enough for comparison purposes, but I can't forsee it shattering and entering the blood stream. First of all, when the bullet enters the brain there will be death fairly quickly. For bullet fragments to enter the blood stream, the heart will still have to be beating to allow the blood to continue to flow. I just don't seem how that would be possible. Perhaps the fragments were lost when the blood flowed out of the head.... but not into the blood stream of his body.

forensic biologist

Asked on Friday, June 27, 2008 at 12:09:05 PM
Reply: Kait's heart continued to beat for twenty hours after she was shot. She was in a coma, on life support.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Question: Hello Ms. Duncan this is N again I don't think you probalu remmber me but to get to the point.

1. It wan't Dung Who killed Kait. He's was obviously too much of a coward. My guess is Kait knew something and Dung being the coward he is panicked and went to the higher up person in the orginization which led to Kaits murder. Then im guessing he had a moment of regret but whoever was over him shut him up.

2. Whoever was over dung is responsible

3. Whoever it was is probaly keeping tabs on this website. So basically the killer knows our every move. And if they are reading this I want them to know that their PATHETIC COWARDS!!!

I need to know is there anyone else. I've manages to piece together my own story of what happened which will explain everything but i don't want to post it. Is there someway I could send it to you. Also I would like you to send me everything that you are 100% sure is true. If you agree to these terms I can't gurantee i can find the killer but i will do my best. So if you agree to these terms please send me and notify me of any secure way we can exchange information. Also I loved your books when I was little and inspired me.

Asked on Friday, June 27, 2008 at 01:02:13 AM
Reply: I'm afraid I can't provide any more information than what appears in my book and on this Web site.

It's also impossible to be 100% sure of anything when everyone tells a different story. All I can do is quote what people said or wrote in their reports and identify who those people were. It's up to you whether to believe Det. Merriman, Officer Wallace, Paul Apodaca, or the two medics who transported Kait to the hospital and say that none of those people was at the scene when rescue arrived.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Question: I think the reason so many posters ask questions or have different theories about the disappearing bullets - especially the ones inside Kait's head - is because it's hard to believe a bullet could shatter like that just from hitting a person's head. I don't remember from the book, were you actually able to verify that this was a legitimate explanation? Have there been other instances of it happening? If someone with specific forensics and/or medical knowledge is reading this feel free to reply by posting yourself, and spare Lois from addressing the same issue again.

Asked on Wednesday, June 25, 2008 at 06:42:34 PM
Reply: Several people with forensic backgrounds have told us that it would be highly unusual -- but not impossible -- for small caliber bullets to shatter in a victim's head and be swept away in the blood stream. We were surprised to hear that. But it makes more sense than the idea of the medical examiner or somebody else digging the bullets out of Kait's head and disposing of them.

I support your question -- if there's anybody out there with forensic knowledge who can respond to that issue, please, post.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Bullents and Casings...Who Killed My Daughter?
Question: I first began reading Kait's story at the end of my seventh grade year. Unfortunatly at that time, I wasn't able to finish reading the book, but I have thought about it every time a similar event occured in the media and everytime I was in a book store, and her story has deeply affected me. Until recently I had never been sure of the title, and it had been approximatly 12 years since I had first laid eyes upon this case. Today I found it again picked it up and read it through cover to cover. Realizing the time which has spanned since her death and now I came online for an update only to discover her case is still unsolved.

What I am most curious about is the lack of bullets or casings found at the crime scene, or with Kait. Since there are no exit wounds the bullents would have to have been lodged within Kait and not having them suggests the extent of "the arm of the law" into the hospital where she was taken to be attended. Have any links been found within the attending hospital staff? Only a surgeon or medic would have the knowledge to remove the bullets and it seems those would be a key peice of evidence. Is there anything that could link the staff to APD, or to any suspects or witnesses?

I am currently a criminal justice student in Texas going into law enforcement, and Kait's story is one of the things which inspired me into this field. Though it may be a small comfort, you and your family are in my prayers, and I vow that within the course of my carrer I will do everything I can to bring resolve to the story every "Kait".

May your Kait's book end soon,


Asked on Tuesday, June 24, 2008 at 11:54:40 PM
Reply: Medical investigators sometimes ARE dishonest, and they often are directed in their conclusions by police officers, who dictate to them what to write in their reports. However, in this case, I don't think that happened. It's more likely that the two bullets in Kait's head were of such small caliber that they shattered into such tiny fragments that they couldn't be located.

But the lack of casings at the scene and the fact that the bullet that penetrated the door frame was allegedly not found in the car are of real concern. The casings must have been gathered up by someone who was at the scene before Criminalistics got there. That, plus the fact that all Criminalistics reports of the second day work-up on the car, during which the third bullet would have been found, have disappeared from the records department and the homicide department, appear to indicate that someone wanted to conceal the fact that the bullet that hit the door was a larger caliber than the bullets that entered Kait's head. If two guns were used, this could not have been disguised as a "random drive-by shooting."

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Kaite's murder investigation
Question: Do you have cold case detectives currently working on the case. Altho the police may have been dirty at the time of the murder, perhaps someone new can shed light on the case at this time. Also, this case reminds me so much of the Natalie Hollaway case in the sense that the mother Beth had done everything to bring about justice and reveal the killer of her daughter while she was on spring break in Aruba. Recently the killer was revealed thru a audiotape whereas he confessed to disposing of Natalie's body however justice was never served. It is one thing to find out the truth and another to get "Lady Justice" to convict these monsters. In any event, I believe that Beth Hollaway now sometimes conducts lectures warning parents about the dangers that exist for young girls on spring break. With your talent, perhaps you could do the same in another vein. So many girls are murdered because they believe they are invicible and take dangerous risks with strangers. It seems that Dung was deceitful from the very beginning insasmuch as he even lied about his age. Imagine if your family knew about all the other stuff that he was involved in. I am sure that you would have done your best to break them up as poor judgement and a trusting nature on the part of your daughter led to this tragedy.

Asked on Sunday, June 22, 2008 at 12:23:09 PM
Reply: Although we would like nothing better, we aren't in a position to "have cold case detectives work on the case." As private citizens, we can't assign cases to the APD Cold Case squad. They choose which cases they want to work on and -- since honest and industrious Det. Roberts was transferred out of the department -- nobody there will touch Kait's case.

Perhaps they fear that, if they express an interest in a controversial case that has become an embarrassment to APD, they, too, will be transferred or let go.

I've reached out to both parents and teenagers in the only way my skills allow -- by writing WHO KILLED MY DAUGHTER? and involving myself in dialog on this message board. WHO KILLED MY DAUGHTER? was written for adults, but, to my surprise, was chosen by the American Library Association as "Best Adult Book for Young Adults" and, by the School Library Journal, "Best Book of the Year."

In a way, it amazes me how many parents are upset by that fact and don't want their children to learn about what happened to Kait. Yet, in another way, it doesn't. We over-protected our own children from the painful realities of life, so I can't condemn other parents for doing the same thing.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
when Dung started to cry
Question: What was going on to make Dung start to cry and call you Mom and say he missed his own mother in Vietnam?

Asked on Saturday, June 21, 2008 at 03:53:57 PM
Reply: He saw me baking a cake.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Who Killed My Daughter?
Question: Half way thru reading your book, and it is hard to put down. Actually, my question is...why was your daughter living with such a shady character? I know it is impossible to have control over teenagers, and you have a lovely family, and Kaite seemed like a remarkable girl. But,did she start dating dung at the age of 16? I have a problem with the fact that a teenage girl brought up in a loveing environment and family would take up with a boy like dung, not really knowing much about him, except that he did not come from a stable family and did not have a job, etc.

Perhaps the real lesson from all this is to warn parents to become aware of who their daughters take up with in these troubled times, where drugs are so prevelent. I am very sorry for your loss, and cannot imagine what you and your family have endured. However, there comes a time when you have to let go and realize that the cards may be stacked against you. The police CAN be corrupt, and perhaps what you are fighting is bigger than anything. I was a victim of a scam, and believe me...I know that the police had a coverup going on. I had everything to show to prove the perpetrator guilty, but the DA\'s office was unresponsive I wasted a year of my time trying to convice them with my evidence. After awhile, I had to decide to forget it. It was nothing at all like what you have had to go thru, but it made me realize that we live in a society that coddles the criminal, plus a corrupt criminal system.
Maryann of NY

Asked on Saturday, June 21, 2008 at 02:01:03 PM
Reply: That's a good question And the answer portrays me as an idiot.

Kait was naive and gullible, but no more than we were. No one in our family had ever been exposed to criminal activity and violence. We prided ourselves on not being predjudiced against people of other races. When Kait started dating this sweet and vulnerable boy, alone in a foreign country, we took him into our arms. The first time he called me "Mom" and started to cry because he missed his own mother so much, I melted. For two years, he spent much of his time in our home. He ate many meals with us. He was with us for Thanksgiving and Christmas. He accompanied us on family campouts. We didn't "know" him well because of the language barrior, but we cared about him and wanted to help him.

We also knew that Kait would not end up marrying him. Her goal was to become a doctor, and that meant many years of college and medical school. We thought that, once she graduated from high school, she would find somebody more appropriate to love. We were bracing ourselves to deal with Dung's heartbreak when that happened.

There was nothing to indicate that this loveable young man (who we'd been led to believe was four years younger than he was), was in any way a threat.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
The Cop?
Question: Did the person with information about that cop ever contact you by private e-mail? If so was the information helpful?

Asked on Thursday, June 19, 2008 at 03:29:00 PM
Reply: Yes to both questions.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
Dung's where abouts
Question: It's been years since I read the book about the loss of your dear daughter. I am sorry for your loss.

Do you know what ever happened to Dung or hsi whereabouts today? Has he ever tried contacting you or visiting Kait's memorial?

Asked on Wednesday, June 18, 2008 at 10:18:51 AM
answer to last post.
Question: yes, I will. Will you let me know by email if it is the same cop? You promise to not reveal my identity? In what way was he influential in the case, negative or positive in regard to helping you?

Asked on Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 11:29:04 AM
Reply: I give you my word, on Kait's name, that I will not reveal your identity to anyone without your permission.

Since I don't know for sure what name you're going to send me, I can't answer your last question. Once you've given me the name, I'll respond by personal e-mail.

Answered by: Kait's Mom
people who shot Kait 2
Question: Well then, it really does sound like a police cover-up. I know that you and everyone else who reads this board would be so happy if the person/persons (police officers) who knew what happended would come forward. I know a retired homicide detective who was still working homicides in that year (1989) and the years following, and just listening (in the past) to some of the comments he made, I doubt that anyone from the APD, or who was involved (friendshipwise or romantically)would ever come forward. They were all with the impression that your family was foolish to think that the killing was anything other than a random shooting. I remember even arguing with him and he got really mad at me. And basically told me that I had no idea what was going on and that I should just keep my \"big trap shut.\" And that\'s putting what he said to me nicely.

The only way, I think, that someone that was close to the incident would come foward is if that person was on their death bed and wouldn\'t care if anyone found out that he/she was the rat.

Asked on Monday, June 16, 2008 at 10:19:37 AM
Reply: Please, send us the name of that detective by private e-mail. You don't have to identify yourself, although, if you do, we promise not ever to reveal your idenity. We make that same promise to anyone who contacts us with information.

We will not contact this detective, because we realize that would be futile and it might also create problems for you, which we don't want to do. But we would like to know if he is the SAME detective who has made similar statements to several other people and/or was instrumental in influencing the investigation of Kait's case, and/or was romantically involved with a female (or male) cop who was at the scene that night.

Answered by: Kait

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